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Money Can’t Buy You Class

June 17, 2010

Money talks/But I just walk/When I can’t stand it

But apparently it can buy you:

  1. An Autotune Machine
  2. A Record Deal
  3. A video with pretty good production value
  4. A baker’s dozen male models
  5. A faux snakeskin couch
  6. The title, “Countess”
  7. A huge f***ing fur jacket
  8. A male model to apply your lip gloss for you
  9. Lots of mirrors
  10. A lovely place setting.
  11. It can buy you this single… if you were so inclined
  12. Oh wait, Class Privilege. Well, shoot.

P.S. Beer doesn’t make people un-classy, and champagne doesn’t make people classy.  I’ve seen more assholes push people out of the way and generally make ass-clowns of themselves to get a tiny sip of Cristal than I’ve seen people push people out of the way to get a sip of rare craft beers (the total is 0). And I go to a lot of tastings with so-called professionals. Tsk-tsk.

P.P.S. I just watched that crap 5 times in a row.

15 Comments leave one →
  1. June 17, 2010 10:45 am

    Is this is dis track of Real Housewife Kim’s Don’t Be Tardy for the Party?!??

    I guess this does prove that not ALL songs with talking in them are great.

  2. June 17, 2010 10:51 am

    @Raymond: You just blew my mind. I just became aware of all these D-List celeb tracks and I can’t look away. It’s like a 12 car wreck on the 405 at rush hour.

    In other news, can’t Kim afford some Starwipes or CGI monkeys or something?

  3. June 17, 2010 11:08 am

    I’m pretty sure that is a fan video, not a legitimate one. Here is a WAY BETTER fan video (that I kinda love for trying to pose like the official):

  4. June 17, 2010 11:20 am

    I LOVE fan videos. I feel a post coming on.

  5. June 17, 2010 11:23 am

    Maybe class can be learned… but not from that video.

  6. June 17, 2010 11:49 am

    Who IS this person? This is the best thing I’ve seen all day. And hilariously ironic in that it is the most classless thing ever.

  7. evmaroon permalink
    June 17, 2010 1:25 pm

    She’s one of the women on Real Housewives of Atlanta, and she uh, brings all the boys to the yard? Doesn’t work against blonde stereotypes? Oh, she owns her own line of wigs. I am not making this up.

  8. June 17, 2010 3:44 pm

    I feel so dirty liking this song! I used to hear it all the time in grocery stores and such and found myself singing it in front of a friend. “Why are you singing a Paris Hilton song?” Oops.

  9. June 17, 2010 3:45 pm

    I didn’t know who sang it. I thought it was Vanessa Carlton.

  10. June 17, 2010 4:22 pm

    Dude, Snarky… I feel you. That song is… well… it’s catchy. The first time I heard it, I swore it was Gwen Stefani. I also felt so, so dirty when I got home and discovered it was Ms. Hilton. Why couldn’t they have sold that song to someone else?

  11. June 17, 2010 5:04 pm

    I want Autotune! I have tons of a material I want to cover! Starting with Through the Fire and Lead Me On.

  12. June 17, 2010 6:26 pm

    I also love that Paris song. I would play it while DJing and order mtherfckers to dance — it sounds dangerously close to a Simply Red song.

  13. June 17, 2010 7:06 pm

    it sounds dangerously close to a Simply Red song.

    I’m thinking of this one:

    This was my joint for years.

  14. June 17, 2010 7:10 pm

    Lawd, is Mick Hucknell wearing a dashiki and a gold toof? I’m pretty sure the Honorary Black Folks Admissions Committee said they’d review his application. Maybe he was confused by the wording in the response letter.

  15. June 18, 2010 12:09 am

    don’t forget the half-hearted attempt at locking his hair! damn, i forgot about that song, but then i hit ‘play’ and I was singing along to all of it.

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