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Quick Pats of Butter: Kate’s not a celebrity, just crap, and Reality kills

April 8, 2010

* All my votes for Dancing with the Stars are going towards Team Niecy, and all of my irritation is going towards contestant Kate Gosselin, even though I never want to give her that much credit.   [If you click on the DWTS recap, scroll down to the bottom to see a clip of her dancing to Lady Gaga’s Paparazzi, but don’t watch for too long, it starts to hurt.]  Apparently I am not alone in thinking that she can’t dance or that she’s not a celebrity.  Yep, me, Bruno, and Hugh are all in agreement that her 15 minutes are long up, so who the hell is voting for her?  I want to see the ABC accountants who handle this matter. (Actually, that is seriously my dream, seeing all the math and calculating what happens for call-in voting shows, because I am a nerd like that.)

* A reality show producer is arrested for murdering his wife.  This reminded me of some other reality show people becoming felons, so I googled “reality show contestants murder” and DAMN there is MORE THAN ONE RECENT NEWS STORY.  There’s the recent conviction of this guy a couple months ago from I Love New York 2, then last fall there was this creepy guy from Megan Wants a Millionaire, and suddenly I’m thinking epidemic!  Epidemic!  Where’s the Freakanomics guy to lay this out for me?   These last two shows are VH1 produced — is there a link?  Bring Matlock in while you’re at it, we need all the smarts we have for this mystery.  Should I stop watching The Millionaire Matchmaker so that I won’t become an accessory?

* There was a discussion around the FRYBUTTER table recently about how angelfire.com is still actively around, which made me think of the topic of Internet History in general, and trying to remember what were the hot sites for the past generations, i.e. 8 years ago.  Then today, I remembered an old favorite:  Black People Love Us.  Luckily the site has not changed one pixel, I’m glad they bought that domain as the 10-year package!

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12 Comments leave one →
  1. evmaroon permalink
    April 8, 2010 3:48 pm

    I’m on Team Niecy, too!

    And clearly, reality TV producers aren’t far removed from over-steroided tier 2 wrestlers on the killing people front. I’m done with my map of reality TV, by the way, and will post it once we’ve broken into the 3-digit universe of posts. But I think you’re right about the creepiness that surrounds/undercuts/is part and parcel of reality television-related personalities today. I think we’re seeing the disturbing products of when celebrity seems freakishly attainable.

  2. April 8, 2010 4:05 pm

    Team Niecy!

    And the articles you cited were on point. Now I got to go back and read more about these reality show fun loving criminals. who knew there were so many!

    Then today, I remembered an old favorite: Black People Love Us. Luckily the site has not changed one pixel, I’m glad they bought that domain as the 10-year package!

    Hot damn that DJ made my day!

  3. araymondjohnson permalink
    April 8, 2010 4:07 pm

    @ev : I can’t wait to see your map! I’m glad I’m not the only one picking up on the creepiness and connecting it to the hyperfast way with which people become famous – also I actually don’t care that hard about Kate’s level of celebrity, I think it’s sort of funny when people make the statement actually, like what exactly does it mean? Is celebrity definable in pornography terms too? If I don’t know you, you’re not famous? I digress, but I think you’re right that has to do with easily attained (and dissolved) and the toll the scrutiny plays on a fragile psyche that wanted the fame so desperately in the first place. I mean, sure I think a little fame could be fun (only if it also comes with a measure of getting bills paid and/or readers of my writing), but I’m not gunning for it at all costs. Of course, even if I was, I’m a writer, so the fastest pace on the fametrack in that profession is still pretty damn slow!

  4. araymondjohnson permalink
    April 8, 2010 4:08 pm

    @Snarky : is the roof high enough? Or does it need to be raised?

  5. April 8, 2010 4:09 pm

    Of course, even if I was, I’m a writer, so the fastest pace on the fametrack in that profession is still pretty damn slow!

    Yes, like “overnight success” that took nearly twenty years.

  6. April 8, 2010 4:11 pm

    @RayRay: LOL look at their fucking fonts. Courier New FTW.

  7. araymondjohnson permalink
    April 8, 2010 6:49 pm

    @snarky : I know, right? My first thought was, is this a geocities site?

  8. hsofia permalink
    April 8, 2010 8:24 pm

    That was truly the worst dancing I’ve ever seen in my life (I looked it up on the internet). Because she did not dance even ONE step.

  9. msjacks permalink
    April 8, 2010 8:54 pm

    These last two shows are VH1 produced — is there a link?

    Not only are they on the same network, they’re in the same family of shows. For The Surreal Life begat Flavor Of Love, and Flavor Of Love begat I Love New York and I Love New York 2. Either Flavor Of Love or I Love New York begat Rock Of Love (paternity is unclear), and Flavor Of Love, I Love New York, and Rock Of Love came together in a holy menege a trois to beget I Love Money. Then, Rock Of Love and I Love Money came together in the most unholy of incestuous unions and begat Megan Wants A Millionaire.

    Maybe I should make a flowchart.

  10. April 8, 2010 9:42 pm

    Maybe I should make a flowchart.

    consider it assigned.

  11. msjacks permalink
    April 8, 2010 9:46 pm

    ok seriously, i is makins a Flowchart. It will be like Genesis in the B-I-B-L-E.

  12. araymondjohnson permalink
    April 9, 2010 12:36 am

    @hsofia : she really seems so unhappy all the time, I just don’t get it.

    @msjacks : thanks for being my Stephen Levitt!

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